On the Creation of the World (Again)
Naturally there are other explanations for where this
glorious world of ours came from. Some look to its name for clues: Adderphue.
In Tekmarada, seat of the most noble and idle of religious
archivists, the Reverend Floppy Eared Bun-i argues that, in the Time before
time, in a Space without space, in an Impossibility without impossibilities,
they used to serve snake curry. The effects of such meals on daemons and the
Frogs (praise be to the sticky-tongued!)
was bound to leave a distinctive stench in the lower parts of Paradise .
The Reverend Bun-i suggests that the Frogs, being tidy beings, decided to
fumigate the place, so gathered all the errant whiffs of after-snake into one
neat bundle and hung it somewhere obscure in the heavens where no-one was likely
to look. Hence the name, adder-phew
Others disagree with the Reverend Floppy Eared Bun-i,
notably the Right Mrs Reverend Floppy Eared Bun-i (divorced). She lays out an
interesting hypothesis. Summarised, (and we apologise for any
oversimplification which might result from this summary), she states that a
concept as complex as snake curry could not have existed before there was a
world in which such a thing was possible, so arguing that the smells of snake
curry gave us Adderphue is therefore an argument a posteriori, without fundament, a logical absurdity and just plain
silly (but, wouldn't you know it, absolutely typical of the Reverend Floppy
Eared Bun-i, who couldn't even starch his thurible without an illustrated
manual).
Much more likely is the argument a fortiori, namely that the Frogs downed forty or more double
scotches and, inspired to see things they'd never seen before, decided to
tinker with reality just for the hell of it and bring their visions to life. It
follows from this perfectly tenable assumption that the world was created when
they'd adderphue, but obviously well before they got to the curry stage.
Others in Tekmarada prefer not to be involved in family
squabbles, especially when one of the family concerned has been champion hippo
flounderer three times on the trot.
It must be said, however, that whilst the theory of the
Reverend Floppy Eared Bun-i (that the world is the redolence of spiced reptile)
accounts for quite a lot (such as the smell of the River Zitsphil), that of the
Right Mrs Reverend Floppy Eared Bun-i, (that the world is the incomplete
ravings of a few drunken adolescent Frogs), accounts for everything. And a whole lot more besides.
From The Book Of Contradictions
to The Book Of Commotions, Hexaglint vs
93 - 93. © His Leaklessness, Philosophus of Arlene.
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